Rat Race

My alarm went off at 5:20 this morning but I was already awake. Because I went to sleep at like 8:45 last night. Because I was so tired and I still hadn't prepped five chicken salads for the week so I could have healthy lunches.

I got out of bed, showered, fired up the little grill on the stove, started cooking chicken and chopping lettuce, bell peppers, tomatoes, cucumbers and green onions. I got everything divvied up and I got my hair done, makeup on, made a protien shake and was out the door at 6:50, with a coffee in my hand (and the trash I had to take out.)

Drive to work. Get to work. Finish up a book list inventory, deliver books and inventories, remember I have to get some kind of presentation ready for tomorrow, realize I didn't make those AIMS Web copies, finished the slides for my 9:00 writing lesson, made some other copies for kinder teachers and ran them over, got the chart paper, my lesson plans, and laptop and hustled to fifth grade.

Nine am writing class and they were loud. I mean, not crazy loud, but too loud for a stressful Monday morning, and this is how I felt:

I have been teaching long enough to know I could bring the kids down from the noise, so we did some deep breathing while I tried to reconnect the wifi (as if my Monday wasn't annoying enough.)

We went on to have a good lesson, but all day I've just been thinking: Is this it? Is this life? Please don't misunderstand, I love teaching. Being with those writers today, and talking one off the whiny ledge, "I'm just nooooooooot goooooooood at writing memoirs." It's totally rewarding.

But you know what else it is? A mental and emotional beat down. Today at lunch in the lounge, everyone said how tired they were. And then went on to say they went to bed so early...myself included. It's Monday. MONDAY!

I know what you're going to say. "Oh, you teachers complaining all the time. Did you forget you're off all summer?" Well, no, we didn't. And that's part of our current problem... May is stressful and busy as hell wrapping everything up. Yes, I'm off all summer *and I should have the funds to get myself to a beach every year. And this year I can't because of the new car (I'm thankful) but I should get both. Because I work my ass off and I deserve it.

There's got to be a better way. Something else.

And there is. Plans are in the works. Stay tuned.