On Thursday evening, scrolling through my facebook feed, I came across a friend's post that stated his children (middle/high school) were not spoken to about Parkside. I immediately felt embarrassed, because Thursday I did not speak to my middle school kids, either. But not because I was trying to avoid the conversation - more so because I don't have cable, my antenna is annoying and spotty, and just really hadn't read much news by that time. I decided then that I would talk to my coteacher about speaking to our students.
So we did.
Friday morning, Andrea and I gathered each of our 8th grade classes in a circle at our meeting space to open up this conversation. With a cup of tea in my hand, I asked who had spoken to their parents or another teacher. Many, but not all, raised their hands. I told them that while God forbid anything like that ever happen at Heritage, we must be aware of the procedures at our school for such a disaster. We reviewed our lock down procedures, spoke to kids about how to move about the room if something like this were to happen and we were to be together at that time. They listened silently, respectfully, and with their hearts as we told them that we are a family, and each one of us is important, that kids must report anything "off" they noice in the hallways or elsewhere. We told them we loved them, and that we would do our best to protect them while they were in our care. We gave them a space to ask questions, and also told them it would be a great idea to speak to their families and friends about this matter.
Thought it was a difficult conversation, it was needed and appropriate.
But then I come back to facebook and I see the black and white conversations going on about this issue that is plaguing our country. To me it seems that many people think that you have to be for guns or against guns, but black and white thinking is a common thinking error. This problem is complex, there are, in fact, many facets to it.
There is a problem with violence in our media. And we all know how much media we consume. Thank you, Holls, for sharing that research.
There is a problem with access to mental health, (thanks, Kaytee) and health care in general, particularly in communities that are poverty stricken. This is a prime reason, I believe, that everyone should have access to health care. As communities, we should want to take care of one another and leave no one behind.
Like it or not, the NRA does have a hand in this mess. They are giving millions to our government officials to run their campaigns, and like it or not, our government leaders are then on the hook for something there. Maybe that is why in Trump's address after Parkside, there was ZERO MENTION of the gun part of the problem.
Guns, too, are part of the issue. Have a listen to this podcast from New York Times, The Daily, for Friday February 16, 2018 (thanks, Coalson). This episode is all about the AR-15. Here you will learn it is easier to purchase this semi-automatic weapon than it is to purchase a handgun.
Another theme we can notice is our family dynamics are changing. Parents, in some cases, are not around as often as they used to be, for a multitude of reasons. Kids are left alone more often, and have high access to the internet's information superhighway, and all kinds of messaging there. While I am a teacher with a very firm set of expectations, and am pretty unwavering in the areas of mutual respect and kindness, one could also argue that kids are different than they used to be. If anyone has a study on this, I'd love to have that in the comments.
I'm sure there's areas I'm missing, please comment with those.
So here's how I want to wrap this up - leaning on Brené Brown, who I admire so much. It started when I read this blog post, which is based on her new book, Braving the Wilderness. While I haven't read that book, I'm coming to understand that this wilderness she speaks of is probably the culture and climate that we are immersed in today.
To speak up about something you are passionate about about takes a lot of courage and vulnerability. To be silent does not. To be curious and seek to understand someone's point of view different than your own takes patience, and courage, and vulnerability. To spout off your ideas only, does not. To be kind in moments when you feel others are on the wrong side of the argument takes courage and vulnerability. To name-call does not. To listen with the passion that you want to speak takes courage and vulnerability. To interrupt, to call something "fake news," to dismiss a side to the argument because the source of the information is not one you believe is factual, does not.
I'm sure we can all agree we want our children to walk into our schools and be safe - both physically and emotionally, and they learn new things and grow. I'm sure we can all agree we do not want people shooting up our schools. I'm sure we can all agree that we want what is best for our children, our teachers, and all those work work in the public sector that make our communities great.
So can we listen to one another? Can we open our hearts and minds and have conversations that will lead to something purposeful happening, that will keep our communities safe?
It can start with you. You can be curios. You can be kind. You can listen with the passion for which you like to speak.
And then together, we can advocate for comprehensive legislation that falls somewhere in the grey area - somewhere between I'm for guns, or I'm against guns. Somewhere where people's rights aren't taken away, yet our communities become safe once again.
I'd love comments with articles on either side of this complicated issue in our country. Even better if they are sourced to studies by the experts.
My apologies if I am mistaken anywhere in this post. In an effort to "brave the wilderness" I'm putting it out there, so just get back at me with anything incorrect and I'm happy to adjust.
Tuesday Slice of Life
4 days ago